What is a dating relationship like for a Jewish teenager?

Oh, to be young and foolish – everybody remembers what it’s like to be a teenager. For some, it makes them laugh, and for others, it makes them cringe. Such are the extremes one goes through during the time called puberty. But how is it today for the younger Jewish generation?

American Jewish teens have it easy. They did not experience the atrocities of the past World Wars. Terms such as Holocaust, anti-semitism, pogrom and the like are abstract concepts to them, unlike their parents and grandparents who knew these things as harsh realities. The good thing is that young Jews still view their history as important, in fact even more so than traditions and religious activities.

Most Jewish children’s involvement in Jewish studies steadily decline after the age of 13. At this time, secular schooling takes precedence, as well as an increasingly active social life. It was found out that teenage dating patterns are affected primarily by their community and upbringing. Jewish teens are more likely to date Jews like themselves if they live in a place where there is a strong Jewish presence. So it seems they prefer their own kind, but circumstances have to help it along.

Parental influence also plays a key role. If parents encourage their children to date and eventually marry a Jew, they’ll consider it more than those who are left to decide for themselves. Their choice of friends has a great impact as well. Those that have very close Jewish friends tend to think it’s more important to date within the faith than those who have mostly non-Jewish friends.

Jewish families place a premium on education, and so the children experience greater pressure to excel. It was also found that by 12th grade, 80% of Jews have part-time jobs to augment their school allowance. This may place a strain on any dating activity they might have by cutting their free time considerably.

American Jews have been integrated so tightly in the dominant culture that the teenage lives of young Jews don’t have that much difference with that of their peers. But within that framework young Jews are still striving, consciously or unconsciously, to maintain their ethnic identity.